Two Lost Worlds
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Movie Reviews of Two Lost Worlds
Movie Review: Obscure film - and with good reason
Summary: 3 Stars
Not much to offer here. This is tough going until the end, and the final "pay off" we waited for (re: dinosaurs & destruction) is pathetically weak at best. James Arness shows up for his paycheck and that's about it. His brother, Peter Graves, had to live with "Killers From Space" on his acting credits and James had this mess. We all have our crosses to bear, I suppose. Video & audio quality are okay. If you can get it for a few bucks then okay, otherwise forget it. There are much better b-film dino movies out there that are truly deserving of your attention. This ain't one of them.Movie Review: What the...? A spliced-up bit of ham, barely coherent
Summary: 2 Stars
Wow. Gathering together miles of stock footage, using leftover sets and costumes, and with a narrator whose dialogue HAD to be written by Ed Wood (c'mon, NO ONE else could write like that!), this is one of the most stupefying flicks I've ever come across. The "clipper ship" has the most Freudian bowsprit I've ever seen (certainly nothing like those actually USED), but don't worry - nothing stays on screen for more than a couple of minutes. The pace is downright frantic - clipper ship, pirates, battle, wild kangaroos, sheep, period-costume ball, another ship, another pirate battle, burning ships, lost island, "dinosaurs", volcano, back to the original clipper. All in about 60 minutes! Yikes!This one may be of some interest to older Detroit-area viewers because the co-star is Bill Kennedy. Bill used to host a daily TV afternoon movie (back in those halcyon days before everything was syndicated to death), trading in on his days as a B-movie actor. He also gets the funniest scene in the movie, when, after having a large (styrofoam) volcanic boulder bounce off of him, he lays down, tells Arness to "take care of Elaine", then jerks his head to the left in the quickest "death scene" I've ever seen. Worth the price of the DVD just to see THAT!
The dinosaurs? Sheesh - must have been used from somewhere else, because they look VERY familiar (in a cheesy Irwin Allen way). But they're just stuck in with less than 15 minutes to go, and have NO bearing on the "plot". Without them, this would have been a "pure" costume-drama. With them, hmmmm, not much improvement.
Not really recommendable unless you want to try out your skills as an MST riffer. (This would have been a GREAT show, with enough extra time for a short!) A bit faster paced than "Lost Continent" (what isn't?), which was made the same year, but LOOKS 30 years older due to the 1830's setting and relentless costuming, and nowhere NEAR the rewatchability factor. Worth a look if you can get it cheap just to see Bill Kennedy and his howler of a death scene.
Movie Review: TWO LOST WORLDS DVD
Summary: 1 Stars
Before making a career out of the TV show "Gunsmoke," James Arness appeared in a series of classic 1950s science fiction films, including THEM!, THING FROM ANOTHER WORLD, and INVADERS FROM MARS. TWO LOST WORLDS, an unfortunate mess, was not one of them. TWO LOST WORLDS tries to be too many things at the same time; it has pirates, ranchers, melodramatic lovers, and intensely annoying "cute" characters like Salty, a dreadful walking stereotype who's supposed to provide comic relief. No one will complain again about Jar Jar Binks from STAR WARS EPISODE I after seeing this turkey. The DVD's packaging promises "Prehistoric Time's Most Awesome Spectacle" and shows two dinosaurs slugging it out. We do see lizards that are supposed to be dinosaurs about 45 minutes into the film. They may be onscreen for about 2 minutes tops. Not exactly truth in advertising.
Image Entertainment has been releasing DVDs of old curiosities to cult fans for a couple years now, and largely I've been glad of it. TWO LOST WORLDS, however, has nothing to offer to even film fans who believe in the old adage "this is so bad it's good". The movie is barely an hour long -- a scant 61 minutes -- and offers no special features outside of a list of other James Arness movies. Consider carefully whether you really want to spend the dough on this film.
Movie Review: two dumb cheap plain worlds
Summary: 1 Stars
boat goes to sea, gets pirated, wins, lands on australia-world1-ok but brief borin land scene, then gets land pirated by same ones, then chased to sea, loses and lands on world 2-no spitting monster vultures or anything but a croc w/ a fin who bit a gila monster-((stock footage from other film-1 mil. b.c. which was on tv recent by surprise free and better because it was unedited)), then back to this pic,-volcano caused lizard & croc jumping, 2 secs of neat but cheap special fx on volcano smoke in background. the next day the group is picked up at sea by their former boat.(b/w boring movie)-if it sells it should be .01 minus 2$ shipping. lousy, i can't even pawn it, they want $1 for it but said i have to get 4 more lousy movies like this one to pawn a total of 5$-just my continued dumb luck, oh but no, i want my $ back kinison).Movie Review: Truly awful
Summary: 1 Stars
I'm a serious fan of the cheesiest old black-and-white monster flicks. I typically sort my lists starting from the cheapest - and so when this one popped up, I bought it. OK, you get what you pay for. Awful. Awful. Awful. Or maybe just boring, boring boring. Where are the dinosaurs? Where is the 'spectacle'. Basically a pseudo western soap opera of the TV kind - that just happens to have James Arness lurking somewhere in the cast (definitely not 'starring'). I tried to give it No Stars - but the system wouldn't let me.
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