The Perfect Man
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Movie Reviews of The Perfect Man
Movie Review: Get new agents ladies
Summary: 1 Stars
I just saw this movie for the first time. It was so bad that I couldn't stop watching it and that it the only nice thing I can say. Whatever were these people thinking when they wrote and read the script? It is cheesy. Choppy and not at all cute, which is what normally saves a chick flick. Movie Review: would give it 0 stars if i could
Summary: 1 Stars
this pathetic excuse for entertainment was so stupid and putrid. i had to take an enema after watching. avoid at all costs.all copies should be burned. Movie Review: The perfect date movie...
Summary: 5 Stars
The Perfect Man is a movie of wit and the heart. It has a little bit of humor in it and a lot of heart breaking situations... and some embarassing moments.
Holly Hamilton is your average teen... except she moves around... A LOT! As she describes to her best friend she meets in Brookland Amy, after another failing romance, "my mom starts out hopeful to find the perfect man but when he dosen't come along in about two weeks, she becomes desperate and hooks up with some loser and I can't do anything about it. When the relationship comes to an end, and it always does, we pack up and move again. I can't even run away because that's what she does."
Those are the words from Holly, mad how she always makes friends and then has to pack up and move when her mom, Jean, has another failed romance. Jean is a hard-working baker that has raised two girls, and had landed a job at Dolorus's bakery in New York. So Holly has a plan to make the perfect man, even if he didn't exist, so she could boost her mom's shaky self esteem and show her mom that you don't need a man to be the "perfect you"
Holly first leaves the most romantic flower, the orchid, and leaves it on the apartment door.
Instant messenging Jean from the account she set up, Holly learns more about her mom than she ever knew, using lines from a romantic guy that knows a lot about woman. His name is Ben and he's Amy's uncle. He is a manager at a ritzy restaurant called "The River Bistro" He tells Holly everything... giving her a CD to give to her mom from the perfect man, that is nothing but happy music and before you know it... the 3 Hamilton girls are dancing in the living room.
Troubles start to come into the picture when Lenny Horton, the bread baker, comes into the picture and asks Jean out. Never laying eyes on Ben and thinking what-the-heck, she says "yes" and Lenny takes her to a tribute band from Stix.
Holly finds out that after going to Ben's place that Ben is the perfect man for her mom. But since she sent him a picture in the mail of him and said that he was moving to China to open a restaurant, they can never meet. Ben does the New York Times crossword puzzle in blue pen, same as Jean... and dosen't think the moon is just a rock that comes out at night, just like Jean... Ben is the perfect man...
Holly confesses to her mom that the perfect man wasn't real after Jean gets a wedding proposal from the low life Lenny, but tells her that there is a perfect man out there that was based on the things that she said and that there is a perfect man and a perfect you.
This movie is warm hearted and funny! Don't miss out on this one folks!
Jordan
Overall grade* A-
Oh, if you saw the movie trailer and wonder what the song is in it, it's called "Waiting for the sun" performed by Sixpence none the richer.
Movie Review: Not Even Worth Watching On Free HBO - Find Another Way To Spend Two Hours (Choose Cleaning Out Your Sock Drawer Instead)
Summary: 1 Stars
I only have two nice things to say about this movie. One is that the premise - a single mom who packs up and moves her two daughters at the slightest sign of romantic conflict - brought back memories of Mermaids, a far superior film. The second is that Carson Kressley, who I usually find annoying and overexposed, for some reason cracked me up here, even though he was so obviously just playing himself.
The ridiculousness of the plot of the movie is nothing compared to the mind-numbing dialogue and the dreadful acting. Just one fine example of this masterpiece: the "love letter" supposedly written by the perfect man contains a sentence along the lines of "loving you makes me feel like I landed on a triple word score," and this drivel compels Heather Locklear to remark on the "wittiness" of her mystery suitor. This is followed by a riveting IM exchange that consists of a lot of "what are you thinking about?" and "my homemade ice cream would go great with your out-of-this world fudge brownies" which supposedly serve as the foundation for a perfect match between Heather Locklear and Chris Noth. No need to find out for yourself, you can trust me - it's that bad.
As far as Hilary Duff is concerned, while I am not a tween, in spite of myself, I have seen plenty of teen movies, with mixed results (I found 10 Things I Hate About You, for example, to be quite charming). And I gave Hilary Duff a chance on A Cinderella Story too. And after this, plus Cheaper By The Dozen, I am forced to wonder how on earth she ever landed an acting gig. Frankly, she puts Elizabeth Berkley to shame.
Movie Review: Treacle Treat!
Summary: 1 Stars
A really terrible film with little to no redeeming value in which we find a "Botoxed", desperate, nomad mother and her two daughters, (the littlest of which appears sporadically throughout the picture when a scene needs a saccharine punch only to vanish when not needed, such as when Hillary and mom go out for an evening without little "what's her name").
Picture this threesome in a beautiful apartment in a lovely neighborhood in Brooklyn, supported only by the mother's job selling pastries at a neighborhood bakery that is peopled with the most sanitized of Brooklyn "eccentrics" I have ever seen, and I lived in Brooklyn for a couple of years, too. Imagine a teenager lecturing this hardworking, single mom about the mom's self-centered attitude ("Why don't you ever think of ME?!!") and then flying tearfully into her beautifully appointed room and going on line on her expensive laptop to write about her terrible mother on her "blog". You get the idea.
Fraught with terrible dialog, dreadful mugging performances, unconvincing situations, more plot holes than pot holes on Riverside Drive in the Spring, this film caused even the teenagers watching with me to groan and writhe and predict the predictable events to come.
Ms. Locklear's performance is flat and dull while Duff's performance is even worse than one might expect with her big, pouty mouth and her overly made up eyes constantly threatening a good cry. Well, bring it on you big spoiled baby because no one cares. Oh, and Chris North, who plays "The Perfect Man" looks more like a one man tribute to "The Munsters" as he lumbers cluelessly around his apartment like Herman while looking faintly like a younger version of Grandpa, (look at his face and project ahead 10 or 20 years and see if you don't see the resemblance).
This film is cloying, pointless and anything but entertaining. It's just an embarrassing travesty to all concerned. "Uncle Ben", (the character North plays) should stick to converted rice, let these "girls" move on to Arizona, and put himself and the rest of us out of our misery.