The Machine Girl
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Movie Reviews of The Machine Girl
Movie Review: Machine Girl... "Buckets of Blood Pouring Out of People's Heads"
Summary: 4 Stars
Machine Girl (Kataude mashin gāru): 7 out of 10: People in Japan must have very high blood pressure. They don't bleed in Machine Girl, as much as they outright gush gallons of the red stuff. The effect is so over the top it adds a sense of outrageous humor to what could have been a fairly grim affair. After all the story concerns a college girl who gets a prosthetic weapon attached to her elbow after a member of the Yakuza amputates her lower arm to disused her from investigating the suiciding of her younger brother.
This quick synopsis actually understates the depravity our heroine undergoes before she gets all Death Wish on anyone with a shiny business suit.
Our Rick Allenesqe heroine is played by the delightful and delicious Japanese model/actress Minase Yashiro. In fact one of the movies strong points is a quite attractive cast wearing schoolgirl outfits and camo like some cosplayers wet dream. Mono-named Asami and Honoka join Yashiro to round out the attractive female cast.
Machine Girl however never really hooks the viewer emotionally. It is all so over the top and cartoonish. Exploitation films often benefit from allowing the audience to get emotionally involved with the characters (Think Mad Max or Savage Streets). I don't blame the actresses in this case; I simply think the script could have taken a breather from the silliness to add some much needed poignancy.
The entire film plays like an overlong Monty Python skit. It has great set pieces, decent special effects and enough fetish material to keep a Chaku-ero fan in his basement for a week. It simply doesn't tell a compelling story, nor does it allow one to become attached to any of the characters involved.
That said however, I simply cannot dislike a film that features a bra made out of industrial drills. So turn you mind off, send the misses out shopping and enjoy.
Movie Review: The "True" story behind this Story ;-)
Summary: 4 Stars
My guess is that Noboru Iguchi, the director of Machine Girl, has been keeping a journal of the most creative and disgusting ways to separate a person from his various body parts. He sits down in a dark room under a low-watt light bulb, and with each entry he throws his head back and cackles. His parents can hear him from upstairs and they wonder...
Hee emerges weeks later with The Machine Girl. He pushes a red button, and his minions come cowering into the room. He pitches the idea, and they nod fervently, drooling with approval. Iguchi then orders them away and to come back with a plot synopsis. They scurry off.
One of them comes back with this: "Ami is a tough but otherwise average high school girl, trying to lead a normal life. Her world comes crashing down when her brother and his friend are killed by ruthless bullies."
Iguchi slams his hand on the table, unsheathes a sword that we weren't aware of until now, and then separates the fool's head from his shoulders. The other minion recoil in fear. Iguchi demands a new synopsis.
I, yes I, emerge. With this: "Girl with a half arm, attaches a Gatling gun to her stump and goes ballistic on a gang lord family. Cough syrup squirts from every human orifice."
Iguchi raises his sword, but I have already ran off. I did not stick around to see him lick the goulash residue from his sword, smiling in approval. "Exceeellleent" he sez with a demonic grin.
Unfortunately, my synopsis didn't test well with the focus groups or the distributors, and so they defaulted to the first one.
But trust me, friends, my synopsis sums up what you'll see in Machine Girl.
Movie Review: More MAN-tertainment Than Humanly Possible
Summary: 4 Stars
Can this film get anymore darn entertaining than it already was? Hard to say because it was already so darn entertaining!! Oh man this so rocked! I was just floored at the amount of blood, mutilation and sheer perversity contained in this film! It was like Japanese Grand Guignol! Honestly, Meatball Machine has nothing on this flick, not one single thing. The Machine Girl had ninjas, yakuza, pinky violence, Japanese schoolgirls, torture, amputations, mutilation, bras with drills and a healthy respect for films like Grindhouse: Planet Terror and Army of Darkness!
Believe it or not I was so mesmerized with the Japanese schoolgirls and gore that I really can't even come up with something wrong with this film! That so rarely happens with me as very little can really claim to be perfect. I suppose if push came to shove I'd say some of the acting was a tad off but, as I've stated many times before, it was all in Japanese so it could have been packed with Oscar award-winning performances and I wouldn't know the difference. Entertaining is entertaining and this was perhaps the best darn film I've seen thus far in 2008. Call me an immature, pervy goremonger but this was glorious.
I was sold on this about halfway through the film. It was so entertaining that I purchased it and will no doubt watch it again many many more times. If you're a fan of films like Kakko Kamen, Meatball Machine and Tokyo Gore Police, why not check this little low budget gem out and prepare to be amazed! Three cheers for Iguchi! Here's hopin' for a sequel!
Movie Review: Machine Girl
Summary: 4 Stars
Ami Hyuga sets out to find her brother's killers, but she loses her arm in a foolish attack against them. After a narrow escape, she is aided by another victim's family, who helps her to build a powerful weapon in order to destroy the Kimura clan once and for all! MACHINE GIRL blasts its way into the next generation of Tokyo shock cinema alongside its ultra-violent cousins like MEATBALL MACHINE, ROBOGEISHA, and TOKYO GORE POLICE. Splatter specialist Yoshihiro Nishimura puts on another vulgar display of missing limbs, exploding heads, and other absurd gags that use everything from chainsaws to drill bras. The film's bloody revenge plot shares much more in common with the Japanese grindhouse classics like LONE WOLF AND CUB or LADY SNOWBLOOD rather than the more recent gorefests, although they each contain plenty of high-powered action sequences and geysers of blood. The acting and storyline here are also taken slightly more seriously than the other films of its kind despite its lighter tone. MACHINE GIRL's endless brutality and off-the-wall humor make it a must-see for hardcore gore fans!
-Carl Manes
I Like Horror Movies
Movie Review: An over the top action Pure Anime Film.. in real life.. GREAT!
Summary: 4 Stars
OK , this movie is so good BECAUSE it is SO over the top. The violence is SO blood-spattering SO over the edge it truly makes this movie pop.
This is the best revenge movie since Kill Bill in my opinion.
If you want a comparision.. remember in Kill bill 1 the black and white sword fight? well imagine all that blood and gore and body parts... in COLOR.
Ok.. why did I give it 4 stars instead of 5? the voiceover (if you select it) isn't that great. It sounds too much like they are in a studio and the movie is playing for them while they do the voiceover (yeah I know that's what they are doing, but this SOUNDS like it) .. so just leave it in Japanese and read the captions!
It is pure a pure Anime in real life, blood doesn't floor it sprays about 20 feet!
oh... and for those who saw the movie..
1) I doubt I will look at tempura the same way again :)
2) MAJOR blooper in the opening scene.. notice the "magical re-appearing arm?" I can't believe they missed that!
Jim