The Karate Kid Part III
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Movie Reviews of The Karate Kid Part III
Movie Review: Utterly disgraceful
Summary: 1 Stars
The original Karate Kid is a masterpiece; a cinematic work of art jam-packed with universal moral lessons, outstanding acting, and jaw-dropping cinematography. The sequel, while not nearly as original as the first, maintains the intense charm, beautiful imagery, philosophical depth, and heart warming music made famous by the first.
Then theres part III...
I am at a loss for words in attempting to accurately describe the horror that is this movie. The acting is atrocious. The plot is paper thin. The "philosophy", if it can be called that, is total re-hash. The reccuring theme of Daniel having a "secret move" with which he is able to thrash the last boss (sound like any videogames you know of??)is intriguing in the first film, acceptable in the second, and totally inexcuseable in the third. What's worse, the secret move is a kata (Cringe..). I'm not sure how many reading this have ever formally practiced a martial art, but for those of you who have not, katas are not magical spells which confound enemies leaving them bewildered and vunerable to being tossed. Remember that if you are ever mugged.
What else is wrong with this movie, lets see...Well, Daniel talks to bonsai trees. Sure, some people enjoy talking to plants, some even says it helps with their growth. Such "plant-talkers" also may be found watering their living-room carpet or baking the cat for 3 hours at 350 degrees. All perfectly healthy behavior, yes, but a bit out of place in a karate kid movie.
I could go on about the absurdities scattered about this waste of a film: the karate instructors with personality disorders obsessed with Daniel, who spend the majority of their days threatening Daniel's life (which strangely enough is a crime in some states), the fact that Daniel's beloved mentor and father figure, who has saved his lfe, built him a very nifty shower curtain halloween costume, taught him self-confidence, self-defense, tolerence and discipline, given him a beautifully restored classic car, taken him to Okinawa, and remained one of the only positive influences in his life since his move from New Jersey to California...is abandoned and shunned for Daniel's pride.
But then I would be typing all day.
This film is an insult to the first two films. Literally, an insult. It is an insult to me, personally, and to everyone who knows and loves the characters of Daniel and Miyagi. It was most likely made in the spirit of Rocky V; a last ditch attempt by hollywood high-ups to squeeze the last drops of money-making potential out of a series that had already peaked, done at the expense of the series' reputation for quality. Shame on you, karate kid 3, shame!
(The one star rating is based on the fact that it does contain SOME nice scenic shots and DESCENT music. Other than those two barely redeeming features, the movie is a waste of space. It is unnerving to even imagine that such a piece of complete trash could be released by a major hollywood studio. This may sound harsh, but if you havent seen it, judge for yourself. Rent it. If nothing else it is a great "invite your friends over and die laughing at the horrible images on the tv screen" movie.)
Movie Review: The PINATA kid...Brays like a donkey and won't fight back
Summary: 1 Stars
TOTAL CRAP
That's how I felt back then when I watched this GARBAGE, and that's how I still feel watching it over 20 years later. When you have sadistic bad guys (Ivan Drago, Thulsa Doom) wreaking havoc on good guys, you can't wait for your hero to BEAT THE LIVING CRAP out of them and say with relief...HELL YEAH, YOU PUMMELLED THAT SOB!! It happened in Rocky 4 and Conan the Barbarian.
But it didn't happen here. Karate Kid 3 is absent of any "hero" quality whatsoever.
Daniel has gone from honorable and strong in KK2 (he pounded the dangerous Chozen into pudding) to a fat, weak, whiny, immature and plain ANNOYING sad sack. He won't shut up, is obsessed with Mac n' cheese and can't score with the girls. Not to mention, his once powerful sensei Mr. Miyagi has gone from peaceful, but powerful motivator to a lame, limp-wristed mentor to Daniel who is beaten senseless by racist, sociopathic d-bags out for "revenge" on him for standing up to Kobra Kai. How dare he stand up to bullies!
Enough about Macchio's bad acting, the bad guys are like lions to the injured lamb of Danny. They cackle like demented chickens as they hatch their scheme, along with their 1 dimensional terrorist karate champ, Mike Barnes (Sean Kanan). Maybe it's me, but there seems to be deep-seated homosexual tensions with these men, who are OBSESSED with Danny and have nothing better to do with their lives. Acting is overdone, annoying and menacing in a very un-Oscar winning way.
I was FEVERISHLY WAITING for Danny to beat the LIVING CRAP out of Barnes, who tortured Danny during the whole movie. Would Danny stand up? Would he unleash what Miyagi taught him? Would he let out his anger like he did to Chozen? Would he smash Barnes face in like Rocky did to Ivan Drago??? Nope..He just does a ridiculous kata to psyche out and win against he competition....Very weak and EXTREMELY UNSATISFYING. He may have won the tournament, but he still failed. So has the rest of the movie.
The only good thing about this movie were the shots of Devil's Cauldron. Very good camera work and cinematography.
KK3 is an example of how to COMPLETELY RUIN a good franchise. Mr. Avildsen should've released a KK4 to erase the travesty of KK3 (and maybe would've eliminated Next Karate Kid) where Danny had not only a good physique, but confidence, strength, determination and DIGNITY.
He had none of these qualities and neither did this movie. Avoid it like a plugged-up toilet.
Movie Review: Just Keeps Getting Worse
Summary: 1 Stars
Wow, they don't know when to quit making these do they?(To answer the question that should have been after the 1st one) By this film it became painfully obvious that Ralph Machio CANNOT ACT. He was beebopping all over the place in this entire film, he looked like a 4 year old with ADHD who had too much pixie sticks. His constant bouncing was the most painful thing about this film.
Next the girl was horrendous. Not even pretty, and had a boyfriend already! Why the crap is she taking up space in the film. I would have loved to see Mr. Muyigi pop out of nowhere when the girl said that she had a boyfriend, hear some action/badguy music playing, have Muyigi say "Daniel Son, watch out!", and then have Mr. Muyigi proceed to kick the crap out of her. Afterwards he would say "You very lucky Daniel Son that Muyigi near. Now we do not have to waste anymore of movie on her." "Gee thanks Mr. Myuigi" says Hyper Son as he bounces up and down.
Next the badguys: Way over-the-top. We have gone from Daniel fighting local highschool bullies to fighting Satan. These guys were just evil. At least Johnny had a change of heart in the first film. I suspect that these guys probably hung outside of the arena after the tournament, and waited with AK-47s. And what was up with these goons constanty harrasing Daniel, and the cops doing nothing? In real life you call the cops after the first time they harras you, and the police will hunt them down. Instead it was like "Gee these guys are constantly vandalizing my store, and all I can do is sit here and watch my non-girlfriend get kicked in the stomach. Oh well."
Finally, the final fight scene: We all know the formula, Daniel will bust out some "secret, special" move at the end to win it all, but did he need a special move? He went from being able to almost murder Chozen, a karate ninja master, second best karate fighter in Japan after Myigig, who's body looked like an NFL players, to not being able to put a finger on this new Johnny look-alike. So stupid. And what was up with his "secret" move? He starts doing kata, and the final bully is like "Woa man. I'm all weirded out and confused." I'm sure in real life that guy would have just given Daniel Son a hard kick right in his stomach. But instead it discombobulates the thug, and Daniel lands a puch to the chest. Daniel should have just put on a pink tutu and start prancing like a balerena to confuse him.
Good thing they finally ended there......wait a minute, no they didn't.
Movie Review: I hope - after this - Daniel San abandoned karate for good
Summary: 1 Stars
This movie is so bad, that it always makes me laugh.
It's really hard to believe that only 1 year has passed since Daniel defeated William Zabka (kinda weird because Macchio looked like a high school kid against a full grown man from some university).
This time Daniel looks much much older (and really fat at 28) than just a year before, but even like that, he looks again physically smaller and weaker than Mike Barnes, our new thug... A too high-strung gorilla that kicks Daniel's butt almost 95% of the movie and keep screaming lines like "I own you, Larusso" (a really annoying guy that won't live much if he keeps being like that).
By the way, Daniel looked equally smaller and weaker than Sato's muscled nephew in KK2. But I guess his karate was better then and that's why he put the asian dude to sleep (temporarily) at the end of that movie.
Anyway, I keep wondering why the hell does Daniel keep Mr. Miyagi as his instructor?
Because his karate it's only good for tournaments. In real life it's useless against Billy Sabka (KK1 thug), Yuji Okumoto (KK2 thug) and the mentioned Barnes (KK3 thug), that keep banging his arse almost during the whole movies! And I'm pretty sure that those bastards waited for him outside, after the duel, to keep banging him like a big band drum.
I think he would have had better results joining the Cobra Kai Dojo.
Or maybe - this is a better explanation - Daniel as a student sucked bad, because Mr. Miyagi, being older and smaller, always kicked the whole bunch's butt by himself, in every movie, without help (?).
Finally, I hope Daniel San forgot everything about that damned karate and looked for a real job, because karate has only brought woe to his life: abandoned by his mother, trashed by bullies, dropped by girlfriends and stalked by psychopathic instructors.
The whole sense of this movie can be seen at the end, when everybody begins to throw Cobra Kai t-shirts over the heads of Terry Silver & John Kreese... Kreese, angrily overreacts and threatens the people near with the back of his hand. An old lady in front of him, just laughs in his face.
Movie Review: Use this DVD as a coaster
Summary: 1 Stars
This is possibly one of the worst films ever made. There's not even the "so bad it's good" pleasure to count on. It's simply a grotesque mishandling of every truth laid down in the first (and quite wonderful) film. It's an ugly movie that basically has our hero Daniel being hounded by an ex-military buddy of Kreese's. They hatch a stupid scheme to get Daniel back for the loss of Kreese's students and school. Daniel is periodically attacked by warped students of the ex-buddy's (his name escapes me, so bad was this thing) who want him to defend his title in the tournament. After much abuse, he agrees, to the chagrin of Mr. Miyagi.
They throw in a pseudo love interest (that goes nowhere), Kreese's character, which was very interesting in the first film, has been debased to scary B-movie proportions, and poor Mr. Miyagi is the only one who comes off with any dignity whatsoever. The villain (ex-military buddy) is so boring it isn't even funny (not to mention the actor who plays him is awful).
This could have been an interesting film - it has some good potential plot points, such as Daniel turning against the truths laid down by Miyagi and shacking up with the villain. But it squanders them all - more like annihilates them in a nuclear fashion. This could have been a noble film, maybe to the point of having Kreese's character redeemed. Instead it's just a stupid, sordid, complete waste of time - I'd call it a C-film that wants to be a hammy B-film.
Terrible. Use this DVD as a coaster, but don't waste your valuable time watching it (unless you use the fast forward button).