Movie Reviews for The Horseman on the Roof

The Horseman on the Roof

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Movie Reviews of The Horseman on the Roof

Movie Review: Feminist Nightmare
Summary: 2 Stars

I saw this movie six or so years ago, and I loved it. Now that I'm a bit older (feminist grad student)I watched it again remembering how much I liked it the first time around. Well, things change. I don't think the main female character could leave the main male character for more than five minutes without becoming completely lost/in danger/helpless. It was quite funny, yet pathetic. To add insult to injury I think they were going for a "strong" and "independent" young woman-type in her character. So if this is how they construct a "strong" and "independent" woman...well I'm sure you get my drift.

Movie Review: Don't bother
Summary: 2 Stars

Everything is this epic film seems forced and unauthentic. Forced emotions. Not much depth or realism to the plot. Terrible dialogues. Some nice cinematography and beautiful bodies, however.

Movie Review: Martinez and Binoche never looked better fleeing War and the 1829 Asiatic Cholera Pandemic!
Summary: 1 Stars

In 1829 the second pandemic of Asiatic Cholera began spreading through Europe.As our story opens in July 1833,not only is the epidemic spreading,but Austria has invaded Italy and Italian patriots have flown to France.This is the backdrop of the story of fleeing Italian Colonel Angelo (Olivier Martinez) and his chance meeting with the Marquess de Theus (Juliette Binoche).This meeting, though,does not occur until the second hour of this Jean-Paul Rappeneau directed period piece.We watch Angelo fight his way through cholera,hysterical townspeople,French police,Austrian soldiers and Italian stoolpidgeons, and each time he escapes miraculously unscathed looking better each time,no worse for the wear.By the time Angelo meets the Marquss,who is held up in her Aunt's manorhouse, the viewer has already been challenged to just keep up with Angelo,whom nothing sticks to him, havingmore narrow escapes than Indiana Jones in all three RAIDERS flicks.I have wanted to like this film over the years,but it is so mind-numbingly ridiculous that one has got to call a spade a spade and just say,"This film stinks like the plague!".

Apart from some of the finest cinematography that a film could offer, watching eye candy actors Binoche and Martinez in an extremely dull script that has possibly the most truncated ending ever remembered by this reviewer,is simply not enough to save this film from being consumed by the crows that peck at the dead bodies of cholera victims.In fact, the crows and the cat are far more interesting than Binoche and Martinez! How many times did Rappeneau direct Martinez to toss his brunette locks???

This film is truly one of the most inane pieces of dribble that I have ever seen.The continuity errors alone are staggering as Martinez and Binoche are continually made even more pretty despite all that they endure.In one seen early on,Martinez is kicked and beaten and bloodied by townspeople,only to be dragged away blood-free!The next scene he is totally cleaned up (though no one has helped him) with only a forehead scar that is gone within hours-no swelling or bruising.You can almost hear,"CUT!!...MAKE-UP!!" Naturally,Binoche gets cholera near the fim's conclusion, and Martinez strips her naked and rubs her down.She survives,though every man Martinez tries to save dies.He never has to strip the men further than the waist!!! Rappeneau seemed more intent on keeping his principle stars beautiful,sensual and pouty-lipped,then tell a story of any real substance.Only the most hopeless romantic would dare not see through this farce! Martinez and Binoche NEVER become their characters and the viewer is always aware that two gorgeous actors are attempting to play their roles.

The ending is unforgiveable and completely unsatisfying and unsubstantiated after 120 minutes of enduring Rappeneau's rant.Did the editor lose part of the film and Rappeneau just say LET'S GO WITH WHAT WE'VE GOT in French? MON DIEU!!!

CYRANO de BERGERAC was so good! What happened Jean-Paul?

Movie Review: Boring, not as romantic as seems
Summary: 1 Stars

This movie has too many scenes that deal with cholera. It's pretty nasty. There is like no romance. It looks like the movie is romantic, but there is no romance there.