The Beastmaster
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Movie Reviews of The Beastmaster
Movie Review: A Differing View
Summary: 3 Stars
Beastmaster / B00005Q4D7
Being very young in the 80's, I missed a lot of the sword'n'sorcery movies that came out during that time period. As a consequence, I tend to watch them now for entertainment value, as opposed to nostalgia value. Although I loved the Conan movies (Conan the Barbarian and Conan the Destroyer) and enjoyed Red Sonja, I can't say that "Beastmaster" is a classic that demands addition to my library.
For the time period, there's actually a surprising level of violence and gratuitous T&A in this movie. Of course, all the sword'n'sorcery movies of the era specialize in violence, but you've got to give this movie credit for the specter of an unborn baby being transferred from its mother's womb (while she watches in helpless horror) to that of a nearby livestock beast - who is then slaughtered so that the baby can be sliced out. There's a heavy emphasis on "sexy ugly" here - with all the female antagonists consisting of a leprous face perched on a siren's body. And then, of course, there's the mandatory "topless bathing" scene so that the heroine can get her 'assets' out for the hero to ogle.
If anything, the heroine is the person I liked best in this film. She's competent to a fault - to a point where I actually expected her to turn out evil, just because she was *that* useful. When she didn't Heel Face Turn, I was pleasantly surprised - if a little sad to see that the 80's "Beastmaster" chick was allowed to be more useful than the 2009 Bond girl we watched the night before. But I digress.
The special effects are campily bad, but in a sweet sort of way - oh, for the days when a 'panther' was not computer generated, but rather a trained tiger with a coat of black paint on its skin. (Also, for the innocence of those days where a black panther was considered a normal addition to a pale-brown desert.) But what was the director *thinking*, when it came time to nobly sacrifice one of the fuzzy animals?
Ultimately, there's nothing wrong with "Beastmaster", and if you're watching for nostalgia, this DVD will provide all you need (albeit without subtitles for the hard of hearing, a baffling decision), but if you're viewing these movies for the first time, I'd recommend taking a pass and watching "Conan" instead - there's not much here for newcomers, in my personal opinion.
~ Ana Mardoll
Movie Review: Still a Decent Classic
Summary: 3 Stars
I have recently purchased the DVD of The Beastmaster and have watched the movie for what was probably the first time since 1983 when it was on HBO. I had forgotten about the bad acting and cheesy lines, but also about how impressive Marc Singer is for such a small man compared to other big screen heros of that day (Arnold Schwarzeneggar and Sylvester Stallone). I also forgot about how gorgeous Tanya Roberts is. Ah, the good old days when PG-13 flicks gave us a peek (we get a nice long google in this one). Despite the low-budget production, The Beastmaster is a rock-solid feast for the imagination. It has all the right elements of a fantastic fairy tale: a vile dictator who epitomizes evil, witches, mysterious flesh-eating humanoid flying beasts, a cool black tiger, bodies impaled on poles, and so on. The imagination that went into this film is really much larger than the budget that produced it, so if you can get past the goofy acting you could really enjoy this story.As for the DVD, Anchor Bay just wanted to get something released for a quick buck. Half of the scenes are crystal clear and the other half are grainy with poor color. The enhanced soundtrack does little to improve the story. The disc also had a habit of seizing up toward the end of the movie. I thought it was my player so I tested it with another disc then replayed the segments from the Beastmaster disc to confirm my suspicion. It seized up again. But when I tracked backward for a few frames it cleared up. The extras are extremely poor in quality and hardly worth watching unless you just have to know the history of the film. The 16-page booklet is quite nice, though. I cannot rate this story any more than 3 stars because it is just another fantasy film regardless of the potential it could have had. The DVD will have to rate 1 star. I can live with the quality, but Anchor Bay has made outstanding discs with older films like Halloween. Too bad only the wildly popular classics get first class attention.
Movie Review: Movie has one part that skips.
Summary: 3 Stars
The product arrived quickly. Looked in good condition. When played the dvd, there is one section that pauses and skips over it. Will not play that one section which is about 5-10 minutes of the video skipped. Otherwise the rest of the movie plays fine. Movie is low budget, but we bought it for childhood memories. Watched it when we were kids and wanted to see it again!Movie Review: This is NOT widescreen
Summary: 1 Stars
Be warned! This edition is not presented in Widescreen as advertised. The manufacturer only put a black band across the top and bottom of the full screen edition. I know, I've seen the VHS edition from the 80s and saw the movie in the theaters. The DVD was made by Anchor Bay. In a side note, a friend purchased a copy of Space Camp which was also made by Anchor Bay. To her surprise it was blank. The Beastmaster case also claims to include a "16 page booklet of orginal preproduction sketches and liner notes" which is no where to be found. All in all this edition was very, very disappointing. I will not buy anything else from Anchor Bay Entertainment. They are misleading their customers. If they had choosen to not make a widescreen edition they should have just left it full screen instead of lying to the public. I'd give the movie a 4 except for the DVD presentation.Movie Review: RET TAG MEDIA RIP OFF
Summary: 1 Stars
I ordered this Beastmaster DVD on Jan 31, 2009. Today is March 3, 2009 and I have yet to receive it. My VISA was charged $15.81 on Feb. 2, 2009. Red Tag Media is certainly one company that is thriving in this poor economy. I will soon go through the proper Amazon process to file a claim.