The Beastmaster
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Movie Reviews of The Beastmaster
Movie Review: A Great Fantasy Film
Summary: 5 Stars
Finally, this 80s fantasy film is on DVD! A must have...Movie Review: Starring.....Marc Singer's Body!
Summary: 4 Stars
Singer had the best male body, bar none, I have ever seen in films and *it* is really the star of this one, right behind the two ferrets, "Beastmaster's" friends. Most of the camera angles enhance Singer's musculature. He has learned how to stand and move to best advantage for the cameras. He's not handsome, though, which doesn't really matter in this film.
The film is fun, action-packed and pretty to watch. While Tanya Roberts in her rather small role is nice to look at, she cannot act her way out of a paper bag, but manages to lend another perfect body to the cast.
Rip Torn, the evil one, barely suppresses a guffaw at the lines he has to say, but pulls it off nonetheless. The plot is good - "Beastmaster" (Singer) is ripped from his mother's womb before birth, placed by occult means into the womb of an ox (cow?) and is then ripped out again at knifepoint. As a result, somehow he is able to communicate nonverbally with animals and they are his helpers - an eagle, a black leopard and two ferrets - on his way to avenge his mother's death.
For what it is (bad acting, beautiful people and an unusual plot), it deserves the cult following it's got. After all, cult movies don't always become so by being great works of art. Buy it just for fun, suspend your incredulity for an evening and just enjoy it.
Movie Review: Bonus star for not being as bad as I remembered
Summary: 4 Stars
Come, let us be honest. You love this movie. You know it's bad, but you love it anyway. I'm like that too. But the thing is, it's not *that* bad.In fact, this may be the most fun movie you've ever watched. I have hazy memories of 4th-grade birthday parties when we begged to stay up all the way until midnight so we could watch Beastmaster on cable...again and again... And now that I have the DVD, I find myself staying up all the way until midnight so I can watch Beastmaster again. Not to recapture my childhood, of course, but because it's the kind of movie that is at its best when you decide to just waste a couple hours of your life.
Also, the DVD version is excellent. The picture quality is much better than I had expected, and there are even a few extras, which is unusual with B-movies, and even more unusual with 80's B-movies.
But, hey... you're not buying this movie for the extras. You're buying it so you don't have to wait for it to show up on cable again.
Movie Review: This great 'B' Movie is a guilty pleasure
Summary: 4 Stars
No one is ever going to accuse The Beastmaster of being one of cinema's crowning achievements, but it is an entertaining bit of escapism. It stands side-by-side with Flash Gordon (1980) as my favorite 'B' movie, although Flash Gordon is much more overtly campy. Make Moses look like Conan and act like Dr. Dolittle, and you've pretty much got the plot. Marc Singer makes a great protagonist - his physique is only a hair less imposing than Arnold's, and he's a heck of a lot better actor. I'd call this the best fantasy movie ever made, but that's kinda like giving out an award for the least smelly pair of unwashed feet. Turn off your brain and let yourself enjoy this one.Movie Review: YEAH, IT'S A CONAN IMITATION, BUT SO WHAT!
Summary: 4 Stars
I'LL BE THE 1ST TO ADMIT THAT THIS MOVIE IS NOTHING SHORT OF A CONAN IMITATION. BUT THAT DOESN'T MEAN IT AIN'T GOOD. IN THIS MOVIE, A SWORDSMAN [MARC SINGER] SETS OUT TO BATTLE A SORCERER [RIP TORN] WHO'S RESPONSIBLE FOR THE MURDER OF HIS FATHER. I DON'T CARE WHAT CRITICS SAY, THIS MOVIE IS VERY GOOD AND IT REALLY DOESN'T GET ALL THE CREDIT THIS MOVIE DESERVES. ONLY BAD POINT IS THE ROMANTIC SUBPLOT BETWEEN MARC SINGER AND TANYA ROBERTS. OTHER THAN THAT, A VERY GOOD SWORD AND SORCERY MOVIE. SCREW THE CRITICS, GO CHECK IT OUT. FOLLOWED BY TWO SEQUELS.