Star Wars: Episode II - Attack of the Clones (Widescreen Edition)

Star Wars: Episode II - Attack of the Clones (Widescreen Edition)
by George Lucas

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Movie Reviews of Star Wars: Episode II - Attack of the Clones (Widescreen Edition)

Movie Review: A Great and Extremely Misunderstood Masterpiece
Summary: 5 Stars

First, there's the acting/script. A LOT of people bitched and moaned about how Anakin's pick-up lines sucked and were delivered without flair. Well, did you ever consider the possibility that maybe he was SUPPOSED to act like that? I mean, the guy is going to be spending the next SEVERAL days ALONE with the girl of his dreams, and he has NO idea how he's supposed to handle things. I mean, the guy probably never even watches TV! Do you expect him to start acting all suave and quoting Shakespeare? Heck no! He sounds like the worst pick-up artist in the galaxy, because HE'S SUPPOSED TO, and this part of the movie was done so convincingly that people actually thought that his acting sucked. If you'll notice, whenever he's NOT trying to get into Amidala's pants, his acting and lines are really damn good ("Life seems so much simpler when you're fixing things..."). As for Amidala, well, she's a Senator being hit on by a Jedi about half her age. So of course she has to give the appearance of being as uninterested in him as possible... once she learns how he feels, of course. Before that, when she doesn't suspect him of anything, she is genuinely affectionate toward him ("You really have grown").

The lack of chemistry between Anakin and Amidala - What are you talking about? They had great chemistry! Remember that part where he floats the fruit off his plate and she takes a bite while it's in mid-air? That's so cute! Sure, there are some parts where they don't have chemistry because they don't want to. Well, DUH! She's a Senator, and he's a Jedi. That's kind of frowned upon by the public, and they know that they can't get too close, so they try not to. They TALKED ABOUT THAT! I mean, how obvious can it be? Again, during the parts where they do not perceive this to be a problem, they have really great chemistry together. I especially like the comments about "aggressive negotiations."

And, of course, there's the CGI. I won't deny that George seems to have a habit of blatantly abusing CGI, but sometimes it REALLY pays off. I mean, look at Yoda. He doesn't look like some cartoon (a la Episode 1), he looks as Jim Henson's puppet came to life! And on that one really rainy planet, the CGI is so good that I can't tell what's CGI and what's not. Yeah, sometimes the CGI is painfully obvious, but it's still better than the Muppet rejects from the original trilogy.

Names. Okay, Count Dooku sounds pretty stupid, and "Attack of the Clones" just screams b-movie. But I think that's part of what makes the movie fun. When other people grimace every time they hear "Dooku," I just grin and giggle. Okay, I'm easily amused. So sue me.

Now that I've shot down all the "reasons" why this movie is "bad," let me explain why it is so good. First, it is the most emotionally intense of the Star Wars movies. Look at Luke Skywalker's reaction to coming home in Episode 4 to find his relatives burt to a crisp. He looks around to make sure they're dead, stares into the sunset, then calmly tells Obi-Wan that he wants to be a Jedi and kick some Imperial butt. Now, compare that to Anakin's reaction upon finding his mother. He actually WATCHES HER DIE, IN HIS ARMS! As his blinding grief turns into blinding rage, he pulls out his lightsaber and starts decapitating Jawas left and right. He doesn't even bother using the door; he's in such a rush that he makes his own. Then, he has to bring home his mom in a body bag. He doesn't say a word to anyone when he arrives, there's just an understanding silence. And there's the sunset funeral, which is just plain beautiful. Do you see the huge difference here? How about the difference between this movie's love story and that of the original trilogy? I mean, Leiah seemed to hate pretty much everyone in the first movie, then she suddenly fell in love with both Han Solo (total selfish SOB) and Luke Skywalker (her brother) at the same time for no apparent reason. Oh, and let's not forget that some actual depth was added to Boba Fett's character this time around.

Second, Clones has the most deep, thoughtful, and intriguing plot of any of the Star Wars movies. It's not just "There's good guys and there's bad guys, the good guys blow up the bad guy's big metal ball of death, the end" like the first Star Wars. There's a very mysterious aura about the plot, which involves a secret Clone Army that had been created for a war that would not happen for another ten years. We know that Jango Fett and some other people are involved, that it is related to an assassination attempt on Amidala, and that it may be related to Palpatine's manipulation of events to increase his own power in the Republic. The pieces fall together at a steady pace, and at the end of it all, you learn enough to make sense of most of it without leaving too little for Episode 3 to mop up.

Third, you get to see Yoda in a lightsaber duel. This is probably not too special on a TV screen, but when you're in the theater watching this movie on opening day, and you see an approaching shadow that can only belong to Yoda, suddenly EVERYONE in the theater starts laughing and clapping and cheering, and the funniest moment in Star Wars history plays before your eyes. That was a moment that I will never forget, because it will only ever happen once in my lifetime, and not everyone got to experience it the same way I did.

So all told, I think the five stars that I gave this movie are very justly deserved.

Summary of Star Wars: Episode II - Attack of the Clones (Widescreen Edition)