Northfork
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DVD Cover Information
Actor: Claire Forlani, Douglas Sebern, Duel Farnes, James Woods, Nick NolteDVD: Region Code 1
Audio: English (Unknown), Unknown; English (Original Language), Unknown
Format: Anamorphic, Closed-captioned, Color, DVD, NTSC, Widescreen
Running Time: 103 minutes
DVD Release Date: 2003-12-30
Audience Rating: PG-13 (Parental Guidance Suggested)
Studio: Paramount
Movie Reviews of Northfork
Movie Review: Utterly absurd reviews
Summary: 5 Stars
We are so fortunate that any filmmakers are taking genuine visionary risks today; trying to create unique moods and impressions. This is a wonderful film, slow paced and artful, dense and oblique, and filled with wonderful surprises and screwball humor. Quite a juggling act and not an obvious one--that's a tribute to the skills of the filmmakers. I was totally delighted when I saw this, I've watched it several times, it gets better with each viewing. Parts are exceptionally moving.
You'll notice similarities in the language used in most, if not all, of the negative reviews of this film. As a whole, they make for an illuminating read, an index of the Pandora's Box we've opened by allowing pop culture to be treated seriously ("Graphic Novels" instead of comic books, as if "Sandman" is the equivalent of "Don Quixote") and permitting kiddies to feel their strong yet ill-informed opinions about anything and everything were somehow highly valid.
"Boring" is the most frequently used word in these short stammering tantrum-like reviews (and in others like them elsewhere--read some Guy Maddin reviews sometime, it's depressing). "Artsy" is the other perjorative of choice (Today the word simply means "Over my head"). "Boring" is not an aesthetic judgement, it's a subjective impression and these days it's most frequently used by intellectually "youngish" people (unfortunately aged 14 to 50) who are equally "bored" by the "artsy" Beethoven or Shakespeare not to mention the ten million other major works of art that fail to titilate them in an ADD adaptive way. The Mona Lisa is boring, as are the Parthenon and Taj Mahal. Nowadays, one always senses a bag of weed, a bottle of beer, and an upcoming MBA hovering over that word; the fact that it may be an expensive imported beer and Ivy League frat-boy Colombian that cost more than most people's monthly food budget changes nothing. None of this would or should matter but the reason I'm making a big stink here is that marketing people, advertising geeks, the media, and politicians determine the texture of our entire culture by listening to kids of all ages weigh the universe in their boring/not boring scales. That's why our culture is almost complete candy-coated garbage nowadays, why childlike primary colors dominate in every sense, why the media is ignoring frontal lobes entirely, zeroing in on the back brain, the Reptilian part that deals solely with "Do I eat it, kill it, or have sex with it?"
I sense this film's severest and most incoherent critics therefore are the same twenty-something "yoots" who burbled and drooled delightedly over immortal classics like "Fight Club" and "Kill Bill." In other words, what I'm saying is that due to bad marketing (I saw this DVD for sale at Target at the mall for Pete's sake!) Northfork accidentally fell into the hands of a lot of toddlers. Normally, we genuinely serious adult weirdos and artists try very hard to prevent that sort of dreadful thing from happening: it's like letting a ten-year-old who's been eating ice cream handle Medieval manuscripts. Confronted with a complicated object that challenged them (rather than merely amuses them or validates a corporate-approved "bad-boy" lifestyle), they got all cwanky, dug out their cwayons, and wrote bad tings on the walls. If the Polish brothers had sensed the way the wind was blowing and included some, say, bondage sex or sex in a dumpster, hyper-violent fights of any type, obscenely large guns, hot chicks in stileto heels and skimpy outfits and other "freaky scenes" the negative reviews would never have materialized; instead there'd be contented cooing. I believe one of the future "Fangoria" magazine contributers or mass media tycoons described this film as a "crap-sandwich." This isn't criticism, this is letting the family dog rate restaurants.
I write this to help any individual here make a genuinely adult decision about trying this movie. If you're mature, intelligent, and sensible, and enjoy unique and imaginative film experiences you'll probably get something out of Northfork, in fact you'll probably be wowed by it. If you think yellow Hummers, violent Japanese cartoons, and "Sin City" are peak moments of Western Civilization do stay away and do keep your juvenile opinions about grown-up things you'll probably never understand to yourselves. For you guys the helpfulness "No" button is below just to the right, unfortunately there's no "Boring" option. Choosing "no" should indicate that the review was not helpful for you in making a decision about the film unless you're a politically correct, terrible-two drone and you get all itchy if a reviewer "flushes" Michael Moore's holy work down a toilet ("No! No! Make bad naughty Michael Moore review go 'way!). Or you can always register displeasure by simply throwing the remains of your Hot Pocket at the monitor screen--you were planning on upgrading to a flat screen anyway, weren't you?).
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