Kazaam
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Movie Reviews of Kazaam
Movie Review: Punish your kids by forcing them to watch this
Summary: 1 Stars
So let's see. Shaquille O'Neal stars as a rapping genie . . . and it already goes downhill from here. The first major flaw of Kazaam is Shaq. Look, he's a very good basketball player (I liked him when he was still with the Los Angeles Lakers), but he is definitely not a very good actor. His performance is really bland and his emotions don't look like emotions at all, except when he gives that creepy smile. And then, there's his rapping. I've only heard Shaq rap a couple of times in my lifetime, and it had to include this. There are scenes in which the title character is giving a live concert in a club. There is also one scene in which he does a random rap number in the middle of the film with Max (the kid protagonist). If you think it sounds really bad, wait until you hear the lyrics. The lyrics . . . MY GOD! These aren't real rap lyrics! They sound like kid stuff! But hey, it's supposed to be a family film, and the lyrics are supposed to be family-friendly . . . I'm going to go listen to Jay-Z and Swizz Beatz right after I publish this review.
But these aren't the only flaws in the film. No, you also have the kid protagonist Max. I swear, this kid has got to be one of the most annoying characters in family-film history! It's really hard to care for him. Same goes for the villain. He's so two-dimensional even for a family film that he makes other family-friendly villains look like Anton Chigurh from No Country For Old Men. Then, there's the special effects, which are some of the most horrible ever seen. In one particular scene when he is on his flying bicycle, you can tell that Shaq is right behind a green screen. I guess they were trying to save some of the money that were put into this lame movie.
So yeah, the critics and half of the Amazon reviewers are correct. This is one of the worst movies ever made. I would say that this is just as bad as Santa Claus Conquers the Martians and Batman & Robin. Don't even think of pressing the Add To Shopping Cart button.
Grade: F
Movie Review: Lacking in sense
Summary: 1 Stars
A lot of this movie is "for some reason"...our hero is chosen in a pretentious disrespectful brat for some reason. Kazaam turns against his new master for some reason. Then he becomes a Gee for some reason. And then he becomes mortal and has a romance for some reason.There are some other problems with this film. As I said, the main kid isn't that likable. They try for the rebel character, but he's just a little snot-nosed brat. I really didn't feel for him too much, and when Kazaam says he has a heart of gold at the end I could only think, "How does he?!" The ending also doesn't make sense: the kid asks Kazaam to give his dad a second change, but he gets arrested in the end. That's not a second chance, that's hard time. I know some people think jail is a second chance, but not at the end of a movie.
This is really an hour and a half waste of time. If you think Shaq is a greatest rapper ever and you still jam to the copies of his music from the game "Shaq-fu" then you will think this movie is da bomb.
Movie Review: Finally, Something Uglier Than One of his Free Throws
Summary: 1 Stars
Shaq is easily the most dominating player in the NBA right now. He does things other people can't do. He should stay to playing ball and leave the movies to someone else.Kazaam is simple enough story. Shaq is a stupid genie who ends up becoming some kids servant. He ends up becoming friends with the kid and they have to avoid getting in trouble and a bunch of other stupid stuff.
The movie wasn't all that funny. The funniest scenes are watching Shaq. He is so huge. His pure size becomes funny. Watching him act is the second funniest part of the film. He is so horrible. He can't use emotion at all and he can't flat out act.
Kazaam was best described in Scary Movie. In the beginning of the movie Carmen Electras character is asked whats her favorite scary movie. She answers with Kazaam. The guy says back that Kazaam isn't a scary movie. Carmen says, you haven't seen Shaq act. This movie really is that bad. I wouldn't waste my money buying or renting it. I just lost brain cells by watching it on TV one night.
Movie Review: Wow, this is, well bad.
Summary: 1 Stars
No I mean really bad. I have know clue what possessed me to se this terrible thing. This film is in need for the MST3K treatment. It is now becoming notorious as one one of the worst movies ever made, and it deserves that status. Usually genie movies suck, and this one was no exception. Anything with a basketball player who tries to start an acting career as a genie in a boom bow has to be bad; and it is. It's even got the most corny sentimentality you'll ever see in a movie, and it's message about second chances in life it absolutely awful. This is even insulting to kids. I mean please people if you have any humanity left in you, you would not punish your children by making them watch this horrendous thing. It's garbage, and if easily one of the worst movies ever. Goodness this stinks. Even worse than Howard the Duck, and that's saying a lot.Movie Review: a masterpiece
Summary: 1 Stars
Kazaam is a terrific piece of filmmaking with great acting(Shaq should have won an oscar for his convincing role as the genie),a well-written script,good direction by Paul Michael Glaser who is the next Stanley Kubrick,and the production values that are above-average. A troubled teen(Francis Capra,who also should have got an supporting actor oscar for his terrific role) meets a rappin' genie and then he makes 3 wishes. This film should won an oscar for BEST PICTURE because this movie is the Citizen Kane of the 90s and it even beats Pulp Fiction as the best movie ever made because this movie is wonderful, in other words Kazaam is a bore. AVOID