Happenstance
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Movie Reviews of Happenstance
Movie Review: Don't trust this movie; worst U.S. cover box hack to date
Summary: 1 Stars
'Happenstance' is an inoffensive enough little movie...a rather bland French ensemble piece of fluff about life's serendipitous twists and turns. The problem lies with the U.S. marketing approach to this movie, which is a complete hack and an affront to any moviegoer's intelligence.
First - there's the marketers' blatant attempt to hitch a ride on the contrails of the Audrey Tautou/Amelie phenomenon. For example, while the cover box features nothing but a pigtailed, doe-eyed Tautou, the movie is anything but a Tautou star vehicle. Granted, she's in the first scene, but she disappears for stretches of up to 15 minutes at a time. 'Happenstance' - released in 2000 - was pre-'Amelie,' and Tautou is just part of the woodwork here.
Second - and more egregious - the cover box picture of Tautou isn't even from the movie itself. It's been lifted directly from the cover box of 1999's 'Venus Beauty Institute' (check it yourself with an amazon.com search). Now, why would anyone reward behavior like this by recommending 'Happenstance' to a friend?
Unbelievable.
Movie Review: Too tedious with no payoff
Summary: 1 Stars
Audrey Tautou hardly says three words in this movie even though she is prominently featured on the cover. The movie is obliquely about her character, but she is on screen for ten minutes or so. It reminded me of a cross between Amelie and the Richard Linklater movie Slacker, but with none of the charm of the former and none of the character of the latter. Most of the characters are losers, but instead of being loveable, interesting losers, you keep hoping that one or more of them will get hit by a bus or something. The only one to root for is Audrey Tautou, but her fate is decided by some idiot throwing stones at a statue in a park, so there's no point in hoping.
Most importantly: while this movie is rated R, it is for a pointless scene of unflattering full frontal nudity of a man, and the actresses who would have been quite appealing in some stage of dishabille remain fully clothed. That alone is reason to get your money back.
Movie Review: What or should I say why?
Summary: 1 Stars
Not much happens for an hour and twenty minutes and then eventually nothing does. Annoyingly slow paced set of unrelated situations. They lead to a chance (re)meeting which we are left to imagine, what if anything, this meeting leads to.
Why anyone would make this mess is a mystery. It is of course dwarfed by the mystery of why anyone would sit through it and have anything good to say about it.
I would like my hour and a half back please.
Movie Review: Boring. Boring.
Summary: 1 Stars
Maybe I was a bit tired. Maybe it was the hot humid day. Maybe it was this stupid cold I can't seem to kick in the middle of summer. Or, maybe, this movie really was as bad as I thought. I didn't care about the characters. The plots, all 17,462 of them, had no point. Not to mention, it looked like they handed the camera to a ten year old and had him pick out the shots. Just because it is low budget, and French, don't make it good. I'm off to rent Glitter.