HIM - Poison Arrow
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Movie Reviews of HIM - Poison Arrow
Movie Review: Poison Arrow
Summary: 2 Stars
I honestly didn't like the DVD. I am a big fan of the band, but it was like watching PBS do a special on HIM. It was almost as if it was a student made film. It was slow moving, had interviews with a lot of people who didn't seem all there, not to mention their PR person was totally wasted the entire time she was talking. Way to represent the band.Movie Review: HIM - POISON ARROW DVD
Summary: 2 Stars
NOT AUTHORIZED BY HIM. NOT OFFICIAL MERCHANDISE. ADD THIS DVD ONLY IF YOU ARE A HIM COLLECTOR. CONTAINS CLIP ART, COPIED INTERVIEWS - NO LIVE MUSIC...IN FACT NO MUSIC AT ALL!!!Movie Review: So disappointing
Summary: 1 Stars
What the heck is Poison Arrow, you may be asking yourself. It is the self-described "unauthorized documentary film packed with exclusive interviews." The first deceit that will get you is the part that says "exclusive interviews". You will think, oh cool, exclusive band interviews. Nuh-uh. These are interviews not with the band, but with people close to them. This is similar to the show "Driven" on VH1, where they have all these close people talk about the band or artist in question, without ever talking to said artist. Turned off from it yet? There's more. Driven features footage of the artist/band growing up, lots of photos, and background music from the artists. This does not.
This documentary has pretty much one real HIM clip that is divided over the length of the movie, and it was taken in an HMV music store. The only background music-and there is a ton-is by everyone but HIM. There are a few pictures, 10 tops, most of which are re-used over and over.
This documentary does have a plus side in that it talks to people the viewer would not often hear from, namely:
* Ville's father, Kari Valo
* Close friend and colleague of the band, Silke Yli Sirniöe
* PR and Tour Organiser, [sic] Tomi Saarinen
* Finnish DJ, Steve Price
* Founder of Goth Metal Meltdown magazine, Natasha Scharf
But that does not make up for the fact that it has next to no HIM-related material. It features no music by the band, nor any performances by them, for this DVD is unauthorized. On top of that, they add insult to injury by showing tons of footage of people who kind of appear to be HIM, but they cleverly (or not?) never show their faces. It uses "rare footage" (the HMV clip??), "exclusive interviews" with everyone but the band, "previously unpublished photographs" (half of which are readily available on the internet), and a bunch of other stuff just vague enough to trick the average shopper into thinking this DVD is worth buying. You know I had my choice recently: to get a special edition of Dark Light or to get Poison Arrow for 6 dollars less. Damn my thrifty ways.
Another bothersome point is that they chose to get a narrator who obviously knows nothing about the band. If she did, after all, she would pronounce their names right. This isn't just your standard "vill-uh" vs. "vill" vs. "veel" debate... she calls him "vill" about four seconds after they show footage of his father calling him by his name, and pronouncing it "vill-uh"... and she messes up all the other names she can, too. She has not a freaking clue, and she has a very forced, snooty British accent.
The "documentary" is only 60 minutes long, and so one might hope that the bonus content makes up for it. Nope. Firstly, there is a redundantly named "trivia quiz" which is only 15 questions long. Nextly, is the "full discography". The albums section is painfully inaccurate, not only by not citing any of the special editions with bonus songs, but by messing up at least one song title, and by using the American version of Razorblade Romance with the German release date. It also lists "Poison Heart" and "And Love Said No (New Version)" [i.e. the 616 version, unbeknownst to the fools who made this thing] as tracks 11 and 12 on the newest album, Dark Light. It is, like all other HIM albums, basically a 10-track CD, with two bonus tracks... but those are not them. Even if they were going to go ahead and break their non-bonus-track-listing habit for the new album, I would at least expect them to know the freaking tracks [which are Venus (In Our Blood) and The Cage, respectively].
Continuing about the discography, the Singles section too, is messed up. It lists the 666 Ways to Love EP as a single, and the entire format of the singles section is messed up. It is also worth mentioning that they show this EP a lot in the documentary, and they have completely removed the words His Infernal Majesty from the cover, possibly in a way to keep it more legal, or possibly in an attempt not to have to explain the band name origin. I don't have the attention span to sort through all of the singles and tell you what all is wrong, so we will move to the curious Miscellaneous section. Within, the first pages are of DVD's... it lists the Video Collection and Love Metal Archives... it gets points for being up-to-date. Nextly is the Maximum HIM CD that can be found on eBay as a fraudulent album... it turns out that the same rats behind this DVD made the CD and are marketing it through this DVD.
Then there's the Beyond DVD section. It's noted on the back of the DVD case. One would think there was something really good, really beyond here... the one thing that makes this DVD worth owning. It is this: an ad for the Maximum HIM CD they sell on eBay.
Basically, this DVD contains some cool info but not enough to merit watching its entirety, nor meriting the price I paid ($20). I would pay three dollars for this after having seen it, and that's being generous considering there's not even an insert piece in the case, and that even the boxart is poorly done.
If you go off of the price I would pay against what I did pay, then this is a
1.5/10: Worthless
Movie Review: don't waste your time
Summary: 1 Stars
This is an utter waste of time and money. If you value either of these two, do not buy this dvd. They constantly recycle the same scenes, pictures of Finland, the band, and the only 3 fans they seem to have found in all of Finland.....Not one second of H.I.M. music is featured in this P.O.S dvd! Random non H.I.M. rock music intrudes and further marrs this snore inducing insipid and unauthorized release.Movie Review: worst "HIM" DVD out there - don't waste your time or $ !
Summary: 1 Stars
This crappy documentary is a complete waste of time! There isn't even any HIM music - just some "rockin" documentary filler music... it's so bad, hard to describe... There's nothing on this anyway that you haven't seen before, except perhaps for the footage of Ville's dad, which was kind of cool... but not cool enough to make up for the painfully lame rest of the DVD. !!!
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