Breakfast of Champions
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Movie Reviews of Breakfast of Champions
Movie Review: I wish there was a choice for zero stars.....
Summary: 1 Stars
First off, even if you have read the book and enjoy Kurt Vonnegut's novels, if you attempt to understand this movie your face will explode. It is completely non-sensical. I had not read the book, and to me this was as fun as setting my crotch on fire. The person I watched the movie with had read the book, and to him it was as fun as setting your crotch on fire and trying to put it out with your face. Watching Nick Nolte's long and enduring preformances were like watching someone try to start a car by licking the battery. It makes you cringe and just doesn't work. The movie follows the rising insanity of Dwayne Hoover (Bruce Willis) that occurs for no apparent reason, because the reason is that his wife committed suicide, but his wife didn't commit suicide in the movie because she is a character that is alive. A character that doesn't exist in the book (?). As someone who hadn't read the book I didn't even know the wife was alive because the scenes she appears in are....confusing. If this sounds like a painfully insane and rambling review, it is because this is a painfully insane and rambling movie. I still seek for the reason behind why his son lives in a fallout shelter beneath his house if his father is a millionaire who can afford to house three people. Why does Hoover turn magically sane from hearing that "life is what you do while you hear" (or something like that)? It made me feel as warm and wholesome as throwing dead kittens at preschoolers. And what is up with his wife (the non-existant character) throwing him shoes and yelling "take the shoes!" What the hell does that even mean! He has to cross a river? To what? His freedom? What was in the water? Why is this happening? Where am I? Why am I here? Why am I so angry? Why do I hate myself enough to still be watching this? I'm sure glad the director is confident enough in his story writing and directing ability that he can throw off the terribly confining shackles of the book he chose to base his movie on entirely and make up a bunch of crazy things that makes no sense at all. I think it's ironic that a movie about a completely insane man who eventually becomes happy at the end can make a happy man go completely insane by the end. If someone said to me, "Hey, want to watch Breakfast of Champions again?" I'd say "No thanks, I'd rather see how many licks it takes to get to the center of a car battery!"
Movie Review: Terrible Movie in it's Own Medium
Summary: 1 Stars
The movie is not as good as the book. It never is.The movie does not closely resemble the book. It never does.
These are the most common complaints I have heard most people make against this film, but I am going to leave those things adside and judge the film simply as a comedy, but first a brief synopsis.
Wayne Hoover is a well to do car salesman in Midland city and he is having a very bad day. He is starting to see things that are really not there and hear voices that are really not there. He is going insane and he knows it.
Kilgore Trout is a sci fi writer who writes outrageous stories that appear in pornograpyh magazines. On the whim of one of his only fans he is invited to Midland city for an arts festival and decides to go. When Wayne and Kilgore meet all hell breaks loose.
The sad truth though is that all hell does not break loose as it should in a comedy like this. The performances are very subdued. For instance Wayne Hoover has a scene with an employee who is secretly a cross dresser about his clothing! What a hoot huh! Unfortunatley no, it is not a hoot it is barely even a chirp. I expected Wayne to jump up on the desk screaming and ranting as would befit a man going insane, but instead he calmly explains to his employee that he should wear more colorful clothes.
I rented this movie expecting a skillfully crafted black comedy, what I got was a gray farce. If you are renting this movie and you read the book you will be dissappointed. If you are renting this movie and you have not read the book you will be equally dissappointed, it is just all around bad.
As a comedy it comes up short. There are hardly any funny scenes. I do not recall laughing once.
Movie Review: Worst Movie of all Time
Summary: 1 Stars
I never bring movies back to the video store. Until this one. My friends and I rented this movie assuming that it would be funny - with a great cast like this, how could it not be? After watching half an hour of this completely unintelligible drivel, not once puncuated by a laugh, mostly spent staring at the screen and then each other hoping that perhaps someone saw the point, I called the video store back and they said we could return the movie. I wanted to like this movie. It was impossible. The funniest part about the movie was the opening credits, and since I have been informed that these are usually done by an entirely different company, the director can't even take credit for them. And even they were too long. The only thing I can think of that could have gotten this movie made with such big stars is blackmail or some other kind of extortion. After that, I would gladly watch Battlefield Earth. Wish I could have given this movie negative stars. Or stars that have just imploded into black holes. That is the only thing I can think of that would get the bad taste out of my mouth. I consider myself to be a rather intellectual person. I like artsy movies. This tried, but too hard, and it was painful. Agonizing. Avoid this movie. If someone pays you to watch it, it isn't worth it. Go rent (or buy) a real movie instead.Movie Review: what a waste...
Summary: 1 Stars
Im usually into bizzare, off-beat movies. so as i looked for a movie to rent i came across this one and the back claims it is a "critically acclaimed oddball comedy". I loved movies like "Being John Malkovich", "suburbia", and "the house of yes" yet this movie is beyond bizzare. Its not the good kind of bizarre, its the bad kind that just doesnt make any sense. There is so much terrible acting despite the good cast (this is possibly bruce willis' worst performance ever...just terrible.) it reminds me of a bad 80's comedy with a shoe-string budget. How the hell did they get bruce in this one? This movie doesnt have much of a plot. And i appreciate bizzare and off beat comedies, but this oen isnt entertaining in the least bit. And the critically acclaimed part?! 3.1 out of every 4 critics in the US slammed this movie as a terrible movie. Dont be mislead.Movie Review: awful
Summary: 1 Stars
first off: i'm a huge vonnegut fan. i remember hearing that they were going to make a movie from breakfast of champions and thinking that it could never be done. the plot of the novel is secondary to vonnegut's rants on modern america and without his narration the plot falls completely flat. this is exactly what happened with the movie. please don't be turned off to the novel because of the film, it is one of the funniest books out there. the movie is very non-sensical and leaves out the suicide of hoover's wife which is really what sets him off. i was very frustrated with this adaptation, they should have just left it alone.